Our final Australian legless leg

So we enjoyed the first few days of 2008 in our favourite Australian city, Sydney. The Sydney festival started on the 5th so we managed to catch some of the free events. Not sure if free equates to crap but Brian Wilson(of the Beach Boys fame) opened the event and left alot to be desired. Mark was soon dragging me off instead to the live wedding event and we were pleased the entertainment improved with 3 unconventional weddings; a very pregnant bride, a bride dressed as Madonna and of course the gay wedding. I had to pass Mark a tissue, he gets very emotional at such "girlie" events.
Our final activity in Sydney was the ridiculously expensive but great all the same bridge climb. Apart from the all-in-one very snugly fitting suits, modelled on the star trek costumes(oh, and the rain) climbing 1200+ steps for the amazing views of Sydney was well worth it.
We left Sydney for Melbourne, the longest leg of our road trip so far. The drive was 9 1/2 hours and we were starting to go mad listening to the best Aussie radio can offer-80's rock, mullets and all. As you can imagine driving from Cape Tribulation to our furthest destination Adelaide has been quite a challenge not least with Guns and Roses for company!
Melbourne was great, we did the cultural things- the Museum where they had an exhibition on "The Body", Mark was as ever queasy and needed to sit down, especially in the naked photo part! He managed the immigration museum ok and we had fun at the seaside resort of St Kilda. Cultural things done we then decided to test the local wine during a good night out with friends Jag and Shane who live in nearby Narre Warren. They were kind enough to accommodate us for 4 nights at their lovely pad, 5 stars for service! We enjoyed getting to know their adorable kids, Jag's home cooking, a truly fantastic Aussie barbie and a splash in Shane's folks' pool.
We also visited nearby Phillip Island, the temperature this day was 40+ degrees! We spent most of our time body surfing to cool down(no nude incidents this time) and also found a bird hide in which we took shelter until we realised the look wasn't cool and couldn't stand the smell of bird poo anymore.
Back of the road from Melbourne we took the very scenic route along the Great Ocean Road. This drive is stunning with amazing views of the limestone coast, we passed the 12 Apostles, the London Bridge(a weathered limestone rock face similar to any bridge) and the Arch. We stayed along the route in Apollo Bay, Port Fairy and our favourite choice of Robe. The temperature was somewhat cooler, cooler but not cold like we're used to at home though. Even so the motels here supplied electric blankets, I would have never believed Australia would own an electric blanket and needless to say we didn't use them as a temperature of mid 20's is just perfect not cold! The cooler climate not only provided unnecessary electric blankets but also the unnecessary Aussie fly, back to haunt us. I wound have bought one of those hats with a net to make me look like a bee keeper if I could have found one- the little buggers are unbelievable- they never stop buzzing around every orifice(I mean every) and we were forced to join every other person demonstrating the Aussie wave to waft the flies a few inches for less than a single second. As if by constantly waving our arms we didn't look psychotic enough we then found ourselves doing a crazy dance by the car to get them off us before our run up and propulsion into our seats. Thinking we'd escaped we would then find one off the buggers had still managed to enter the car with us and we'd be left dreaming of owning a bee keeping outfit- or a gun! Speaking of cars, we had another incident whilst driving on the beach in Robe. Of course it had to be me driving when we managed to get stuck in the sand. Blaming my driving, Mark summoned help from a local- "no worries mate", and the 2 of them pushed the car out, I off course I had the more challenging task of turning the wheel occasionally.
From Robe our next port of call was the Barossa Valley before our final destination of Adelaide. Our accommodation in Barossa was one of the best yet, it was a lovely little mountain cottage with solar panels(and hence no extravagant electric blankets here), home grown veggies including carrots to feed to the 2 resident donkeys, a telescope to star gaze and home baked bread. Hippie paradise, and all built by the owner who sported a bright red skin head and numerous piercings- SHE was great and had actually won the "Better homes and gardens" award for DIY Oz queen. I was inspired, Mark intimidated. He liked the donkeys though and we both loved the local wine and food. We hired bikes for another steaming day of exercise combined with visits to 8 or so vineyards. I'd say I was spitting 50%, worried me and 2 wheels may not match too well intoxicated, Mark spat 0% but fortunately the only casualty was his T-shirt which was covered extensively with tastings from most vineyards but hey, it matched his Jack Duckworth look. A wee accident had occurred(whilst sober) between his foot and his specs, the first aid kit finally got some use, the plaster tape effect is great look!
Adelaide is our final destination and I'm writing this on our last day in Oz before we fly to New Zealand tomorrow. We've chilled out here, drank lots of caffeine, ate great food, sampled the wine, admired the city and surrounding rural areas- pretty much more of what we've enjoyed for the past 3 months. Cheers to Australia, we've had a great time and we know we'll be back, lets hope the flies aren't waiting.

Tree does her best impression of Judy Finnagen....

After Brisbane we headed down the coast to Byron Bay. We arrived in Byron late evening and as we were both tired and hungry we decided to treat ourselves and booked a table in the best restaurant in town. We bought a good bottle of wine and set off on the 30 minute walk into town. We'd seen the menu earlier and were looking forward to tucking into a big steak and the fish of the day. We arrived at the restaurant and waited to be seated. Some of the dinners looked at us a bit funny as were were waiting and I assumed it was the dribble down my chin as I was getting very hungry. The waitress arrived and we explained that we had a table for two booked for nine. She politely told us that it was ten o'clock and the kitchen was now closed. We had apparently and unknowingly passed into a different time zone on our journey from Brisbane. Not only did we lose an hours sleep but we ended up eating a dodgy pizza instead of a gourmet feast!
Although Byron Bay has got a very beautiful beach and surrounding area the average age of the people there is about 17. We therefore stayed in an expensive B&B for 2 nights which was tucked away from the main town in a quiet little cul-de-sac. On the first night the owner informed us that her daughter was having a party and the house would have about 40 sixteen year-olds arriving. Obviously as we are both relatively still young and down with the kids it was no problem for us. We were a little cranky and tired in the morning but knew that we would get a long sleep on the second night in preparation for our long journey the next day. That evening when we were walking back to our B&B we could hear some seriously loud music. Once we got in our room we realised that next door to our B&B the neighbours were having the biggest party in the history of New South Wales and they must have had the Bass speakers turned towards our wall. Maybe if they had been playing a bit of Bowie (or Abba for Tree) it would have been OK. As it was we didn't get any sleep and vowed never to return to Byron Bay again. We also realised that we weren't really young anymore and had were actually middle aged and grumpy and had lost touch with popular music years ago.
We were therefore happy to arrive in a town called Bellingen later that day - which has got to be one of our very favourite places in Australia. Bellingen is beautiful. Its greener than anywhere else we have seen and has miles of rolling hills. Its like England/ Scotland only better. The small town is really relaxed and friendly. We spent most of our time wandering around, drinking coffee, reading and playing cards. We had a chalet in a peaceful spot overlooking trees and birds - what a place. We went for a walk in the National Forest which had some amazing views. At one stage Tree was attacked by a leech. As it started to get stuck into her tasty leg she spotted it and panicked flicking it off in my direction. I, of course, reacted very calmly and despite what Tree may tell you I didn't scream like a girl.
Next stop was the Hunter Valley which is a famous wine producing region two hours north of Sydney. On the first day we decided to walk to a number of wineries for some free tastings. On the map they looked to be really close to each other. It was very hot and the sun was beating down making one mile by foot feel like ten. We were the only ones walking and everyone else seemed to be driving. There was no way we were going to be spitting out the free wine so we persevered. After an exhausting day we saw the words, "Not to scale" at the bottom of the map and both agreed that Tree would drive next time. The following day we attended a wine school in an effort to learn how to appreciate wine. I wanted to be able to walk into a supermarket or Oddbins and choose a wine based on its grape, age, region and vintage. Unfortunately, the wine school was crap and we got our money back. I'll still continue to choose wine based on how snazzy the label is.
We set off for Sydney and arrived in my spiritual home of Bondi for Christmas. I had spent nearly six months there ten years ago. It had changed massively and nobody recognised me! We had ice-cream from the shop I'd worked in. I had spent the previous three months telling Tree how it was the best ice cream ever. She thought it was alright but not a patch on Senior Whippy's from Bolton.
It was great to go on the beach and get into the famous surf again. If you hit the wave wrong it would take you off your feet and spin you around so that you'd land on your head. After half an hour we both got caught in a big wave. As I emerged from the wave 20 foot nearer the beach I instinctively looked up to make sure Tree was alright. She stood up a few feet away smiling and waving. She looked a bit different and at first I couldn't work out what it was. I looked around and everyone seemed to be staring in our direction. It's only when I saw a dad putting his hand over his son's eyes that I realised that Tree had 'popped out' of her bikini. This was no Judy Finnagen 'slip' but was a full 'exposure'. Tree never went back in the water...
We had a lovely Christmas day in a park near Bondi that overlooked the city. It was very different having outdoor champagne and strawberries on a sunny and warm day. We obviously missed everyone but it was good to experience a completely different type of Christmas.
We left Bondi and set off for the nearby Blue Mountains for a couple of nights. These are a vast expanse of mountains covered with Eucalyptus trees which give the mountains a blue haze as their oil evaporates. We first went to the Three Sisters which is one of the most famous attractions. Although they are quite impressive the five hundred other tourists made them seem like a theme park. The next day we set off on a long walk and saw some stunning scenery at Wentworth falls. The trail took us on a downward walk for a few miles before it we came to some stairs to take us back to the top of the gorge. When a say some stairs I mean one thousand and fifty. We were both absolutely knackered and realised that there's more to this travelling lark than good eating and pottering about the famous sites.
We arrived back in Sydney for New Year's Eve. We met up with my 'cousin' Richard and went to a party at his girlfriend's parents place overlooking the harbour. We were made very welcome and had a great time. We were just a short walk away from the fireworks over Sydney harbour. These were amazing and I will never again think that 'once you've seen one set of fireworks, you've seen them all'. The only downside was that within one hour of the new year I managed to break my new year's resolution of being less clumsy. By 1am I had spilled a drink in the house and stood on some unfortunate Australian girls toe drawing blood and leaving Tree to explain that I always did this sort of thing and that it was genetic....